Much has been written about living a purposeful life and its relationship to happiness. I have addressed this issue in my recent book, Living Life from the Inside Out: Who You Are Matters. The questioned addressed in this post, however, is whether it is necessary to live a purposeful life in order to be happy. Can people be happy and feel satisfied with their life simply by getting up each day and going fishing and watching the clouds go by?
I am reminded of the story of the wealthy American who goes to Mexico for a vacation. While there he decides to go on a fishing boat to fish for marlin. He goes down to the pier where he meets Pedro, the owner of a rather nice looking boat and he charters Pedro and his boat for a week. After a week of fishing the American approaches Pedro and tells him that if he played his cards right he could increase the size of his fleet and be able to have several boats chartered at the same time thereby increasing his income. Pedro asks the American, “why would I want to do that?” The American responds by saying, “If you had more boats, you could earn more money, and with more money you retire and spend your days fishing.” Pedro, perplexed by the idea says to the American, “But that’s what I am doing now.”
Pedro is content with his life. He enjoys fishing and found a way to earn a living while doing what he enjoys doing. He is happy. For many people Pedro’s life would be perfectly satisfying. He lives his life without a grand purpose. He does not ponder his own existence nor does he raise the question of why he is on this earth. He is not particularly concerned about making a difference in the world, accomplishing great things, leaving a legacy, accumulating wealth, or making his mark. He simply lives his life doing what he enjoys doing: fishing.
But there are others in this world for whom such a simple life is not possible. They experience a need for something more. They question the purpose of their life. For these people life is not simple. Many of the people who seek my counsel ponder their own existence. They often find that they are merely living a life designed by someone else and experience little joy and getting up each day and head off to work. For them, life is the proverbial daily grind. Whether it is work in a factory or going to a plush office, life is experienced as drudgery, devoid of meaning.
For these individuals finding meaning in their life, finding purpose to their existence, becomes important and perhaps necessary. For them happiness may only be experienced when they are able to see the relevance of their life and work with the context of some grander design.
The world’s religions were designed to answer such questions of meaning and purpose. According to the Old Testament God chooses the ancient Israelites to spread His word to the rest of the world and commands them to make a difference in the world and continue God’s work on earth. What a huge responsibility! Purpose was dictated to the Israelites: to live a life according to God’s word, go forth and multiply, and be an example for the world to follow. Most of the monotheistic religions that followed also state that man’s purpose is to make a difference in the lives of others. As a way of making such behavior more enticing, it is said that righteousness shall be rewarded in heaven.
Positive Psychologists state that happiness ensues from living a life of purpose. When people live their life according a set of value based principles, they are more likely to have a fulfilling life.
But what about Pedro? His life is not religiously based, not value based, but rather based on the principle of getting up each day and going fishing. Sometimes he fishes alone and other times he fishes with people. The people with whom he fishes pay him and the money goes for food, clothing, shelter, bait, tackle, and gas for his boat. He is content; he feels happy. He does not question the meaning of life; he simply lives his life.
So, in answer to the question of whether it is necessary to live a purposeful in order to be happy, the answer is no, it is not necessary. If you can create a life similar to Pedro’s, where you can follow your passion, do what you truly enjoy doing, and figure out a way of paying your way through your passion, the chances are you will feel content and happy just like Pedro. On the other hand, however, if you are among those who question life’s purpose, if you ponder the meaning of existence, and feel the need to make a difference in the world, then you might want to consider how you can create a life based on your values. You could develop a core set of values that forms your internal compass; this internal compass drives your actions.
[Dr. Dreyfus is a nationally recognized clinical psychologist, relationship counselor, sex therapist, and life coach in the Santa Monica - Los Angeles area treating low sexual desire, premature ejaculation, sexual addictions, drug and alcohol abuse as well marriage and relationship communication and intimacy issues. The profits from his latest book, LIVING LIFE FROM THE INSIDE OUT along with his other five books, are being donated to charity through the website Book Royalties for Charity and can be purchased through Amazon.com. Please become a fan on his Facebook Fan Page by indicating "like" on the page by clicking here. You can also find more tools to help you experience a more fulfilling life by clicking here to visit his website.]
Tags: awareness, life changes, life enrichment, living consciously, Personal Growth, self-help
